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2002-03-17 @ 1:48 p.m.
i just want him to love me, I can keep on lying to myself and pretend that when he touches ne i don't feel explosivley happy, but i do!i do! his touches were always so soft, and affirming of my place in his life. I just wish I knew you know?
wish I knew if they ment anything to him.
I want to hear him say it. "i love you" justone more time, bcause i forget how it sounds from his lips and how his mouth looks when he forms the wrds, and if he told me just once more - i would develope photograpic memory and play it again over and overnd pretend it is real. thats how much i want it.
but i settle for a pat.